Nothing is half as embarrassing as hanging out with friends and realising that you are not as rich as they are. Especially, if these are friends from primary or secondary school or university days. Or the friends from an old neighbourhood. The friends with whom you fantasised buying your mothers aeroplanes. Those friends you ate fries with in your university days. Or played “suwe” with. Maybe, the friends with whom you compared dick sizes in your secondary school dorms. Perhaps, you are still job hunting. While they are living the life. You find out that these richer friends can afford the original versions of the Yeezy you have been eyeing and can take Uber around town when you still jump “danfo”.
You miss these friends and would want to roll with them as you did before. There is need to find a way around it. You can’t wish their success away. But, you can tactically be friends with them, and not be stressed. To cope with richer friends, I recommend that you should:
- Be Honest: Lying to your friends is like lying to yourself. Your richer friends would definitely spend more money than you do. They’d dine at more expensive places. Uber to everywhere(that’s if they don’t have cars). They’d wear bigger brands and dress better. If they don’t know how tough things are for you, they’d be quick to regard you as stingy. Nobody wants to wear the “stingy koko” label. If you are on a tight budget, say it. If you can’t afford the asoebi, talk. When you can’t dine at the expensive restaurant, say you can’t and suggest an alternative that works for you. And if your richer friends are good friends, they’d understand.
- Be Appreciative: Don’t always decline your richer friends attempt to help. Good friends help each other. If she decides to pick the bills at a fancy place, go ahead and have fun. If she gets you matching outfits when she shops, collect. And appreciate the kind gesture. Don’t allow yourself to think that your richer friends are trying to show off and rub it on your face that they is richer. What again is the definition of friendship?
- Give What You Can: Friendship involves give and take. It’s not a contest of who gives what and who didn’t. Say, your richer friend is planning a birthday party, you can volunteer to be the event planner, knowing full well you may not be able to afford an expensive gift. How about a handmade gift? And even if you want to give something monetary, don’t break your bank. He gifted you an Ifeanyi Manuel custom-made outfit because he could afford it. What can you afford? Give that. If your friend decides to have the bill at the fancy restaurant, you probably can afford the t. fare. Give what you can afford and when you can.
- Not Be Jealous: Having richer friends can cause jealousy to come up no doubt. But, you have to watch it. Don’t run off comparing your richer friends’ lives and yours. Don’t feel envious or jealous. If you can’t feel genuinely happy for him or her, biko end the friendship. You are not in a competition. No matter how hard you try, one person must be richer. And if you aren’t the one, be happy for that friend who is.
- Be Proud of Yourself: Don’t allow yourself to get intimidated by the situation. You may feel ashamed of how much you earn when the topic arises. You may begin to feel insecure when your friend recounts their expenses or experiences. Remember, you still get your bills paid somehow; you earn lawfully and things can turn out better for you. Be proud of how far you have come. Be proud of your achievements. If the richer friends stick around you, call you on the phone and all; he or she appreciates you and find you valuable. Don’t sweat it!
- End the Friendship: Don’t come and go and die on top friendship. If it’s not working, don’t fake it, end it. If you have tried to let your richer friends understand that you can’t do all that they do because of your economic situation, and they fail to understand. Run along. If you find yourself consistency jealous of your friends, leave them alone. If you get unduly stressed from the friendship, take a walk.
Have you had richer friends before? How was the experience? What are the takeaways? How else do you cope with richer friends? Do share!